Saying Goodbye
by Eissalande
Summary: A nice songfic about Kaoru thinking about Kenshin. It takes place after Samurai X: Reflection so there is a spoiler in it. You have been warned!


Hey! Okay, this is my first songfic so tell me what you think, ok? This fic is about Kaoru's dwelling thoughts on a dead Kenshin. The story is in first person so this is Kaoru's direct thoughts. The thoughts a more like as if Kaoru was actually taking to Kenshin. If you haven't seen Samurai X: Reflection, then you might be lost. So, please read, enjoy, and reveiw.

Song: Evanescence- My Immortal

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You know where I am? I'm sitting under the tree you had laid under when you finally left. I had turned to see your reaction of what I predicted would happen in the future, but you just had your eyes closed and smiled. I touched your beautiful face to feel it cold. It had lost the warmth that you had given it. I had longed to feel that warmth again only to feel it disappear the moment I touched it. You finished it, my love. You completed everything that you wanted to complete, leaving me to complete mine on my own without you there to help me.

_I'm so tired of being here_

_Suppressed by all my childish fears_

_And if you have to leave_

_I wish that you would just leave_

_'Cause your presence still lingers here_

_And it won't leave me alone_

But no matter what I do, I can't seem to move on. You're always there, my love. You always seem to be watching me complete my tasks. However, my tasks are getting harder to complete everyday. Yuri Shiratori is beginning to take over my chores now because I can't do them anymore. I won't blame you for it. I asked you to share with me some of your pain. I did and I received some of it in the shape of a disease. The disease is all over my body now, like it was when I saw your's.

_These wounds won't seem to heal_

_This pain is just too real_

_There's just too much that time cannot erase_

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears_

_And I held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have_

_All of me_

I remember when you would fight to protect me. You saved me so many times. And what did I do for you? All I could do was thank you for saving me and blessing me with the many gifts you gave me. I remember when I first met you. Your face showed the hard times that you had faced throughout your life, but they showed the happiness you had for finally throwing away those memories and starting a new life. Of all the people I know you killed in life, there was one that always stayed with you. Her name was Tomoe. She was your first love, I know. I tried to find ways on making you forget about her, but I realize now that I was being selfish. I know now, that I was supposed to let her stay with you. I was supposed to let your memory of me sit next to the memory you have of her. How selfish I was! I wanted you for myself, but others needed you, too. And now, I know why I did such a thing.

_You used to captivate me_

_By your resonating life_

_Now I'm bound by the life you've left behind_

_Your face it haunts_

_My once pleasant dreams_

_Your voice it chased away_

_All the sanity in me_

Your memory still lingers here with me. Your memory lingers with many people. So many people remember you as the Battousai, but others will remember you as the Ruroni you became. I will always remember you as Shinta because that is how I believe that you wanted me to call you, by that name.

_I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone_

_But though you're still with me_

_I've been alone all along _

There was that point of my life where you were no longer near me. You were away on a mission for the army. Before you left, I saw the scars...the marks on your arms that told me that something terrible had happened to you. When I asked, you didn't answer. When I told you to share it with me, you gave it to me.

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears_

_And I held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have_

_All of me_

Now I am ready to move on. I can do it now because I have realized all the selfish things I have done. I don't know how I will finish my days, but I know when they are done I will see you again, my love...Shinta.

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Okay. So what did you think? I had watched the Samurai X movies and thought that a nice songfic would work for a oneshot fan fiction about the movies, mainly Samurai X: Reflection. I hope you enjoyed it. Please reveiw and tell me what you thought of it. Thank you. 

-Eissalande


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